How To Translate Account Executive
While digging through one of my reference books recently, I found this age-old clipping that used to hang over my desk. It still cracks me up today as much as it did back in the 80s when I found it originally.
How to translate A.E.
By Rob Resnick
As any creative person knows, what an account executive says and what an account executive means can be two very different things.
These are a few standard lines that every creative person has heard from the A.E., along with the appropriate translation.
What an A.E. says: We’ll be in this weekend, too. We’ll cheer you guys on.
What an A.E. means: We’ll order lunch!
A.E.: Keep it simple.
Means: We don’t have any money to spend on this ad.
A.E.: It’ll only take five minutes of your time.
Means: Forget your lunch hour.
A.E.: Don’t spend too much time on this ad.
Means: Don’t do anything creative. I want this ad to be an easy sale to the client.
A.E.: They loved the ad!
Means: They changed the headline and the visual. But other than that, they loved it!
A.E: The client wondered if there is any way to get more brand registration.
Means: Make the logo bigger.
A.E.: Use existing artwork.
Means: Don’t spend a cent.
A.E.: There are some minor changes coming from the client.
Means: The client is rewriting the copy.
A.E.: Are you willing to fall on your sword over this?
Means: I’ll have you fired if you keep giving me trouble.
A.E.: Don’t spend more than twenty minutes on this direction.
Means: Spend the next two days in this direction.
A.E.: I’d like to show the client a range of ideas.
Means: I have no idea what the right direction is.
A.E.: I’ve got a super, super rush.
Means: I just found an assignment the client gave me two weeks ago under a stack of memos.
A.E.: You’re the perfect team for this new project!
Means: You’re the only copywriter and art director available.
Fantastic Margaret. Here’s another favourite:
A.E. I have a wonderful opportunity for you.
Means: I couldn’t get anyone to agree to take on this crappy project, and, by the way, you don’t have plans for the weekend do you?